Fresh off winning the Novice NAGA nogi Heavyweight New England Championship in Submission grappling last weekend Teddy Panos hit me with this bomb this morning, “Apply to fight George Zimmerman and win $10 grand.” Sold. Fired off an email to email@example.com this morning telling them who I was, that I’m from Lowell and Micky Ward could train me for this car wreck. I don’t hate George Zimmerman but $10 large is reason enough to whip anyone’s ass. So I ask you readers of The Cabot to email firstname.lastname@example.org and tell fight promoter Damon Feldman to pick me Mark Lynch over the other applicants because of whatever reason you want to give. C’mon you know you want to see me knock him out.
Friend of the blog and author Donna Lethal is making her triumphant return to Lowell this week for a limited visit before heading back home to Los Angeles. Thursday night at 7pm at Zeitgeist she’ll be doing a reading from her book “Milk of Amensia” which is all about growing up back in the 70’s and 80’s in the Mill City.
This clip is a three minute sumation of why Yoko Ono sucks. End. of. Story. I don’t care what Mara Dolan thinks.
Pro tip: NEVER pick a fight with a bouncer that outweighs you by at least two weight classes. There’s a reason Anderson Silva will never fight Cain Velasquez, the prosecution gives you exhibit A. Nice suplex there by the bouncer too. You can tell by the wild swings Geordie hasn’t seen the inside of a gym or dojo in quite some time if ever. Homeboy got BUNDLED.
Skip to 4:33 for what the room was like at the Dom Polski last night. It was certainly a who’s who of local pols, glommers on, family members, concerned citizens, elderly, local yocals, local media, citizen journalists, and of course campaign workers. Even the Lowell Sun photog was harassed for being “suspicious looking” outside.
Robert Mills @Robert_Mills
Dear Dom Polski Club; just because our photographer is black doesn’t mean he’s a suspicious person. He was there to photograph your event. 7:34 PM – 30 Sep 2013\
I’m not saying I’m Han Solo but the things I do for this site and WCAP. I need a raise.
and the whole city goes nuts. Multiple stabbings, it rained cats and dogs, some asshat flees a home after his Pitbull mauls a Rat Terrier to death, and the Lowell Sun outs Rachel Chandler as an illegal chicken keeper. That fact was known to many for a couple of weeks or longer depending on who you are and when your editor asked you to publish the story. (right Lyle?) Messaged received loud and clear Lowell. I’m not allowed to take any more long holiday weekends away, the residents sense a disruption in the force and everything goes to hell in a handbag made at one of the local art studios. I get it.
OJ Simpson, George Zimmerman, and Me. All found not guilty. The justice system rules. Vindicated!! However I spent $25 to fight a $35 unsafe vehicle operation(two ear buds in) ticket. Not to mention $4 to park, having to drive to Lawrence, and use of a vacation day. I was also advised by the court magistrate that I should stop using my one ear bud with the microphone on it to call people because if I don’t I will be most likely be stopped again. So all in all after a bogus stop on 93 it cost me a vacation day, and $29 to keep points off my license. What a racket.
Whether you’re writing or receiving a ticket for wearing TWO earbuds, there’s an epic a-hole involved in the equation, somewhere, right?
Mark is in the courtroom as we speak with a team of Lawyers trying to get this charge overturned. Since this has to be the only ticket ever written for this law, I imagine every legal mind in the country is on the edge of their seats waiting to see how this one goes.
Photo from http://theawesomer.com/giant-earbud-speakers/2332/
This kid made me buy some Brazilian food before he’d take a photo with me. Kabob was great. Give it your best shot below. Prize is TBD.