John Kerry puts on the Ole Double Runners to pump up everyone at USAHockey

If our Secretary of State keeps referring to himself as hockey player, we’re going to be invaded by Canada.

Give this guy the Drunk Vezina

There’s nothing worse than trucking your ass out to horrible rinks, at horrible times, only to have the other team’s tender not show. Look at this hero. He was probably 8 deep down at Molly Kay’s (or whatever the Chzech Version of Molly Kay’s is) getting ready for Monday Night Football when his team captain called wondering where he was. But being the gamer he is, he suited up to give the other team something to pepper. I love his spirit. He can play for me any day.

Can Chicago be the first team to get their Cup privileges revoked?


Just days after having to pressure wash the scent of the Cubs off Lord Stanley’s chalice, now we’ve got this prepubescent, date rapist rubbing his munge all over it. It’s a total abomination. Leave it to Chicago to start scheduling cup time for every loser in town. I heard Blagojevich was holding a silent auction to attend his day with the cup. Can we put and end to this or what?