Growing up to be a responsible adult male takes a lot of work. It takes years of teaching from our elders. It takes hundreds of mistakes. It is a lifelong learning experience that none of us will ever perfect but we keep trying. I think we have all absorbed many of the same little tid bits to make us better men. Beyond being responsible, we all strive to be good dudes. Guys that people want to hang out with. Today I want to impart a few ‘tips’ that will hopefully make sense. I stole a few of these from some men a lot wiser than me and added a few of my own. These tips apply to men of varying ages and stages of life. The old saying before someone offers you advice is “take this with a grain of salt.” Yeah, I dont know what that means? Take my advice with a shot of Jameson.
Here are your 37 Guidelines to being a Good Dude:
1. Give a firm handshake…..unless you want to really freak a guy out…then offer him the ‘dead fish’ and a painfully slow wink
2. Chew with your mouth AND EYES closed. Power move.
3. Love dogs. Hate cats. (I hate both but I have no soul)
4. Learn for cook for yourself. If not for yourself, for the ladies. A man in a kitchen is irresistible.
5. Always give up your seat on the bus (do people still ride the bus?) to an older, a pregnant, or a hot woman. If a woman possesses all three of these attributes, give her a high five as well.
6. Fight fair. Always. Unless said opponent is stronger, bigger or tougher. In that case, throw a sucker punch and bolt for the fire escape.
7. Learn to like (or at least fake-like) martinis or whiskey. James Bond & Frank Sinatra can’t be wrong.
8. Always hold the door open for a woman. If you have to hold a door open for a man, then no eye contact or pleasantries allowed. Continue reading