Author Archives: nedmillcity
And they’re at it again…
We’ll keep this blog up for the next few days just to allow these two groups of totally sane people to reach the voters who are undecided on this high school issue, so that they can be informed while still not showing up to vote. We’ll happily post any material, or propaganda that hits the inbox.
“We’ll have to get creative”
Sent: Sun 11/02/2014 8:48 AM
Subject: Last Night
Didn’t get a chance to huddle last night, but awesome job…or should I say…”Wicked Awesome” job. We’re inside a year until go time. Being subtle is for pussies. Let’s rock and roll.
PS> For my introductions going forward, we can probably start adding in the laser lights, dry ice, and references to my supreme leadership.
(Credit: Lowell Sun, Lowell Live Feed, Muriel Parseghian)
How much does it cost the tax payer to man the @MassGov Twitter Feed?
How much does it cost to the tax payer to man the Mass.Gov Twitter Feed? It doesn’t matter how much it costs, because the information that they are raining on my twitter feed is fantastic. “Don’t stand next to a tractor during a thunderstorm”…duly noted, sir! Ever since their little “Sexual Assualt is avoidable” snafu, it’s been nothing but fastballs with no movement..right down the heart of the plate.
I thought I’d throw my hat in the ring just in the event that the maestro of @massgov account needs a vacation fill-in.
I’ll start it out slow with this one:
I’ll follow up that captivating tweet with a helpful one for all you romantics:
This next tweet would be categorized under “sanitation” and “plumbing infrastructure.”
Now that I have you’re attention, I’m going to let the masses know that we here at the @Massgov twitter department have learned from our mistakes and are better equipped to manage the nuances and sensitivity of discussing sexual assault in under 140 characters:
This summer is approaching half time, time to put down the remote and enjoy all the outdoor recreation that this great state has to offer:
There’s a lot of anxious kids heading off to summer camp worrying about whether or not they’ll be able to make new friends:
Keeping with the social theme, let’s work on becoming more responsible as consumers:
And if the folks in the State Human Resources department haven’t escorted me out of the building yet:
Quinnipiac Non-Graduate falls a bomb threat short of being one of THE GREATS.
HAMDEN, Conn. — Fearful that her family would learn she was not graduating, a 22-year-old woman phoned in bomb threats to Quinnipiac University on Sunday to try and force commencement ceremonies to be canceled, police said.
Hamden police said Danielle Shea of Quincy, Mass., gave a detailed confession after being arrested at the indoor campus athletic arena, the TD Bank Sports Center, where the commencement for the university’s College of Arts and Sciences had been moved because of the threats. She was wearing a cap and gown she’d purchased.
Police said Shea didn’t attend the university this year, but her mother paid thousands of dollars she thought was for her daughter’s education. When graduation arrived, Shea panicked when relatives didn’t see her name on the graduation roster, they said.
According to police, Shea made two calls to the university’s public safety department. In the first, about 20 minutes before the start of the 6 p.m. graduation ceremony, she stated there was a ‘‘bomb in the library,’’ said police. In the second call, about 20 minutes later, police said Shea warned ‘‘Several bombs are on campus’’ and noted ‘‘You haven’t cleared out graduation. That’s not a good idea.’’
I saw the initial headlines on this story and thought this was going be your typical “Falling one credit shy” scenarios or “Couldn’t walk because I got too many open container tickets” and I was fully prepared to note that fearing your parent’s disappointment in any of these scenarios was absolutely ridiculous seeing they’ve been cutting tuition checks to Quinnipiac of all places, for a minimum of four years. I’m pretty sure their outrage peaked somewhere between pulling that last rejection letter out of the mailbox from one of the UMASSes and licking the envelope on the first outgoing check. If they haven’t tempered their expectations by now, you shouldn’t care enough to call in a bomb threat, let alone invite them to graduation.
But this is something different. This is a full scale embezzlement scheme that came up impossibly short of a smashing success because she couldn’t figure out how to get someone to say her name into a microphone. That one little detail was the difference. Danielle Shea would’ve been living on easy street back in Quincy with half the debt of her contemporaries and mom and dad wouldn’t have been the wiser. Instead of marching into interviews this summer touting that bulletproof Quinnipiac “Arts and Sciences” degree, she would have been telling real life stories of “a successful track record of long term planning, goal execution, and delivery in a deadline driven environment. “ So close, to being one of the greats. So close.
PS. In fairness to all you sensitive Quinnipiac graduates out there, I only know like five people that have graduated from QU and they all played on the hockey team. It is safe to say that their journey to becoming captains of industry ended well before sixth grade.
Double PS. I also didn’t get into UMass. I may have been accepted had I applied, but we’ll never know.
LOWELL — The bikes lanes installed on Father Morissette Boulevard last year could soon be a thing of the past.
Mayor Rodney Elliott and City Councilor Rita Mercier have filed a motion for Tuesday’s meeting requesting that the council vote to revert Father Morissette back to four lanes of traffic and have the bike lanes removed.
The roadway was converted to one-lane traffic in each direction last year when bike lanes were added to the street.
Elliott said the lanes are a safety hazard for drivers and the reduction in traffic lanes to accommodate them hurts traffic. He also same he believes the lanes are underutilized.
“We have enough traffic congestion problems, we don’t need to create anymore,” Elliott said. “The intent should be to move vehicles in and out of the city.”
Last February, the City Council approved a $2 million loan order to allow the city to purchase more than 150 parking-meter kiosks and add more than 150 parking spaces, as well as some of the kiosks, on the street. Elliott was the lone vote against the loan order.
“Bikes are out. Cars are in. Mayor Piper, out!“
I hear you Rod. This Bike Lane bullshit is for nobody but hippies and drunks. F’ that noise! We don’t need it! The sooner we get back to funneling two lanes of traffic onto our one lane bridges, all will be right in the world. The sun will come out, RIMZ-U-LIKE will be back in business, we’ll be able to keep the high school downtown…wait, what?
PS. Nobody hates bike lanes more than the old dudes. Its as if the Doc flips some sort of switch during that first prostate exam that sets off an irrational tick the moment painted bike lanes appear. They start hooting, hollering, and having legit heart attacks…which is why you see Grapes Mercier cosigning.
Gov. Patrick at Corn and Co. at Mill No. 5 in #Lowell #mapoli pic.twitter.com/NerlvS7tny
— Lyle Moran (@lylemoran) April 24, 2014
Look at him… the May-ah! He’s got to be the happiest guy in the league. Every picture he takes looks like he’s having a sexual experience. It really has been a pleasure (pun intended) watching this guy perform his duties. I hope he decides to run for Mayor again, because his ray of sunshine is intoxicating.
Gov. Deval Patrick with record that has tracks from his father, Pat Patrick, at Vinyl Destination in #Lowell pic.twitter.com/uGJfU1Mg5V
— Lyle Moran (@lylemoran) April 24, 2014
Wicked Shitty? More like Wicked Awesome. Slainte!
LOWELL — After 81 years in business, Corey Belanger said it’s time for Majors Pub to reinvent itself.
Belanger, who has owned the downtown pub since 2001, and is just its third owner overall, recently announced that Major’s will change its name to Wicked Irish Pub n Grill later this year.
“We’re just changing with the times.” he said in a recent phone interview, adding that the bar for many years served blue-collar downtown workers from businesses such as Courier Corp. and Joan Fabric. “This place has a rich history, dating back to the Prohibition Era. But it’s time to gear up for the 21st century.
“We’re very excited. This is not an easy choice to make.”
Belanger said the bar will begin its transformation in early August, about a week after this summer’s Folk Festival.
“We’ll have a ‘Farewell to Majors’ week,” said Belanger, who was elected to the City Council last fall. He said the week will feature an auction of Majors replica, as well as other promotions and T-shirts.
I love it! Councilor Corey doing it big and giving all of us a taste of how great downtown can be if you just give him the keys. The Wicked Irish Pub and Grill. Fantastic! The only thing I can think of that is slightly less subtle would have been “Massholes Drink for Free Pub” or the “Mickey Wahd’s my Cousin Tavern.” And it makes sense. If you can’t get the stench of the Dubliner out of the floor boards (or the coke residue and the hookers out of the basement), the only logical thing is to hang a Tri-Color on the front door, stick a hurley behind the register, and add a bowl of piping hot Dinty Moore Stew to the menu aaaaannnndd…Failte! Ladies and Gentlemen, it’s The Wicked Irish Pub!
h/t to KPax.
New City Manager: A Real Mill City Cinderella Story
March Madness ended with a bang last night in the chambers of City Hall. The field…nothing short of exceptional. As far as we know, at least 5 of the 30 candidates had most of their mental faculties. The battle was fierce, the carnage was epic, and in the end, one man was left standing. But not just any man. Not the man that 172 of 174 ESPN analysts had as their “locks.” No, no! What we got here is a bonafide Cinderella story.
A man named Murph.
Murph’s resume may not have been as prestigious as the Subway Sandwich Artist or as tailor made as the Columbian guy that failed to attend a Chilean flag raising. But he lists his hometown as this place called “The Highlands”…which has yielded some of the greatest leaders this earth has ever seen…William Wallace, Robert the Bruce, Robin of Locksley, Pat Donovan of Van Greenby, to name a few. That’s good enough for me. I look forward to getting to know this guy a little better over the coming years…and as you can probably tell, “the pleasure is all on this side of the table.”