Back Off in #Haiku. 12/28/15-1/2/16

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[Please note: These haiku are translated from angry anonymous messages published in a newspaper in the general northeast corner of the Commonwealth of Massachusetts (USA). The Sons of Franky Cabot are not responsible for whatever the point of the original messages might have been.

Also, if you want to buy my books on Kindle that’d be cool.http://www.amazon.com/dp/B019GLL1S8/ref=cm_sw_r_tw_awdo_9BYDwb1Q0YMTF]

Monday, 12/28/15

Boxer should retire.
All those fights have done their harm.
Pastures are calling.

Fiorina stays.
She can beat anybody.
Except maybe Trump.

Donut shop tax break..
Like they’ll bring in some tourists.
Our town is struggling.

Insane light display.
Bigger than Disney Parades.
Pride of cul de sac.

Trump and Obama.
More in common than you think.
They’re both dictators.

Apple Computers.
Just a Chinese company.
Not like Nokia.

Trump is all they’ve got?
Fifteen people were on stage.
Evolution failed.

Moved to New Hampshire.
To avoid wage increases.
Polartec fleeced us.

Officer on phone.
Wonder who he’s talking to.
Wish I had that job.

Fight the drug dealers.
Cut heroin at the source.
Narcan’s behind this.

Clinton will close schools.
That ain’t a President’s job.
Border patrol is.

Sentences cancelled
Undoing work of police.
Obama loves drugs.

Roads must be repaired.
Taxes pay for things like that.
How government works.

Tuesday 12/29/15

Beautiful picture.
Best front page you could have run.
Meaning of Christmas.

You nailed the cover.
Wonderful picture of Christ.
No pun intended.

“Night Before Christmas.”
Front page poem was much needed.
Tradition should grow.

Merry Christmas all.
I say this to ev’ryone.
The rabbis love it.

Anti-Christians suck.
We’re surrounded by many.
They hate our good vibes.

Give me for Christmas
The head of Roger Goodell.
Kids need role models.

Night before Christmas
All barbershops were shut down.
Town run by grinches.

Prostitution sting.
Put a damper on Christmas.
Needed to be done.

Congress is sneaky.
Lobbyists now non-profits.
You watched a ball drop.

Beggars increase trash.
Councilor got it cleaned up.
Mayor did nothing.

Mayor proud of work.
But it was a half-assed job.
Parking but no stores.

Wednesday 12/30/15

Like did not Star Wars.
Too commercialized it was.
Tix costly they are.

Democrat debates.
Clinton doesn’t want viewers.
She chooses time slots.

“Black Lives Matter” sign.
I believe all lives matter.
Even the priv’leged.

Global warming’s nice.
Saves me money on heating.
That seems ironic.

Hustle and bustle.
Ain’t got that out in these parts.
We’re one town over.

Silent but deadly.
Gas leaks all over the town.
This government blows.

Beggars should clean up.
Doesn’t seem like much to ask.
It’s their goddamn mess.

Thursday 12/31/15

Trump’s a douche nozzle.
But he has a right to speak.
He can be peaceful.

Protesters are mean.
If you don’t like Trump stay home.
Trump’s open-minded.

Free speech is for Trump.
Protesters don’t have any.
Next they’ll deport him.

Kid speeds down Main Street.
Cop sees and does not chase him.
Laws are meaningless.

New Hampshire blames us.
Says we’re the reason for drugs.
We don’t have those crops.

Gas under two bucks.
People pay thirty cents more.
They should shop around.

It isn’t hate speech.
They’re just prone to hurting folks.
Religion does that.

Friday 1/1/16

Kids should learn the law.
Amendments apply to Trump.
Let the poor man speak.

Our rights are infringed.
We have a right to be scum.
Slave owners said so.

Tsongas Arena.
Named for a quality man.
Unlike Trump Plaza.

Repairs came out nice.
Looks incredibly nicer.
Father Nick gets thanks.

Beggars ev’rywhere.
It’s like an epidemic.
And they’re all loaded.

Saturday 1/2/16

Tribe members all gone.
Sport logos all we have left.
That’s our heritage.

Poor job snow clearing.
Preschoolers could do better.
There goes the budget.

Plow the width of street.
Things too narrow as it is.
Mice can do better.

Two thousand sixteen.
Hope this year goes much better.
Last year can bite me.

Mice and preschoolers.
Do they make shovels that small?
More storms are coming.

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