[Please note: These haiku are translated from angry anonymous messages published in a couple of newspaper in northeast Massachusetts, USA. The Sons of Franky Cabot are not responsible for whatever the point of the original messages might have been.]

Monday

Vote on Saturday.
More people would show up then.
Unless it’s nice out.

Election workers.
All did a wonderful job.
Nice and supportive.

Pave the overpass.
Everything else came out nice.
Bridges are crumbling.

Lowell Registry.
Less pleasant than dental work.
A very bad trip.

Pretty juvenile.
We know you don’t like the Prez.
But be an adult.

Tuesday

Supportive comments.
Beautiful positive thoughts.
Rainbows and puppies.

I’m a freethinker.
Just like my party tells me.
You guys are all sheep.

Lanes should be painted.
Let me know when to leave this road.
Marketing can wait.

Housing Director.
Shows up and puts in his day.
Last guy never did.

Michelle down in circ.
Got me back on some kid’s route.
Paperboys hate me.

Thursday

I could do that job.
And I’m a crazy old guy.
Come change my diaper.

All pipelines are bad.
Not just the one in your yard.
I need a Keystone.

Thank all of our vets.
Ballsiest mofos out there.
Make sure they get fed.

Bush was a nightmare.
All is better with Barrack.
Women have rights now.

I agree with that guy.
Nothing for me to say here.
He got that thing right.

Demo-rats all suck.
Country’s just going to hell.
I like name calling.

Friday

I don’t wanna work.
Let me hide behind the flag.
I hate immigrants.

Give ’em all a turn.
Let each of them be mayor.
Gavels mean nothing.

I like veterans.
Bunch of brave motherfuckers.
Buy them each a beer.

Lowell hates my kids.
Street paving blocked my driveway.
They’re going to starve.

Santa’s silhouette.
Lit up City Hall’s clockface.
Bring him back to us.

Freshman volleyball.
The girls didn’t lose one game.
Lowell High kicks ass.

Saturday

Underlings are rude.
The Chief does all that he can.
Blame the officers.

Surveys costs too much.
Manager should do his job.
Witch hunts shouldn’t fly.

Low pay fast food jobs.
Manufacturing is gone.
Things have gotten worse.

Golfer moving up.
Makes ten grand in a weekend.
No cheap beers for him.

Street lights are needed.
Police parking lot is dark.
Lives are being risked.

Stupid do-gooders.
Always trying to do good.
Don’t help me any.