Back Off in #Haiku. July 6-11th, 2015


[Please note: These haiku are translated from angry anonymous messages published in a couple of newspaper in northeast Massachusetts, USA. The Sons of Franky Cabot are not responsible for whatever the point of the original messages might have been].



Cops killed a white guy.
No marches are organized.
White people aren’t like that.

Obama’s done well.
Stop acting like he hasn’t.
Trump is subhuman.

Cops using whistles.
Whatever happened to that?
Attention gathered.

Stop holding us back.
Liberals aren’t progressive.
Pipes are the future.

Confederate flag.
Protect it like the real one.
Part of history.

Chelmsford hates budgets.
Assessors going shopping.
Please wait for the sales.


Knowledge Bowl winners.
Signs in photo distracting.
Pawns for the union.

Debate is healthy.
Free opinions important.
The Board does it right.

Take down orange flags.
Only one flag for this land.
States are United.

Dracut had fireworks.
Some towns chose to skip them.
Happy to live here.


Squirrels have found me.
Take them back to the boat house.
They’re driving me nuts.

Utility guys.
Cleaned out debris around tanks.
Concerns respected.

Firefighter drove drunk.
Why haven’t I read ’bout that?
Just what’s been written.

Jimmy and Billy.
I’ll vote for them ev’ry time.
Rita too I guess.

Assessors can guess.
Improvements will add value.
Keep them out for that.

Informative call.
Should have listened all the way.
Nothing to object.

Cops gave a ticket.
Jerk in a handicap spot.
My heart still dances.


Parks can be lonely.
Bussing folks to other parks.
Where friends might come from.

Stop punishing truth.
Honest candidates are rare.
Let Trump speak his mind.

Bad politician.
Donald Trump is too honest.
Wish I’d said those things.

DCF takes kids.
Foster parents are all bad.
They treat kids like props.

Fireworks ordinance.
Completely ignored again.
Police aren’t busy.

Restaurant spokesman.
Removed for being creepy.
Submarines can sink.

Paper knows prices.
Getting leads on increases.
Like they’re in the know.


Sacred Heart Parish.
Didn’t have that much money.
Just socially rich.

I missed the fireworks.
Didn’t expect them early.
Loud noises surprise.

Meter enforcement.
Will lead to fewer tourists.
Folk Fest will be dead.

Squirrels are not pests.
They’re an enjoyable sight.
Like Disney movies.

Dracut Selectmen.
Not helping with any bills.
Too predictable.

Victim of drive-by.
Will Obama eulogize?
No one’s telling me.

Sound Off


Can’t use racial slurs.
But choppers have tribal names.
No one complains then.

Title IX backfired.
Money cut from basic gym.
Most girls are fat now.

Iraq had the weapons.
Delays gave time to hide them.
Convoy trucks were seen.

Obama pulled troops.
Led to the rise of ISIS.
Can’t work with this guy.

The Kurds are Muslims.
We’ve supported them for years.
Plus they live elsewhere.

Use military.
Navy seals can stop drug boats.
Special forces too.

Where is the Navy?
Special forces and Rangers?
They can stop drug flow.

Have tech students fix farm gear.
Save cash and build resumes.
Ev’rybody wins.
Iraq had Sarin.
A deadly gas used to kill.
So that’s a weapon.


Methuen fireworks.
Held on Sunday July 5th.
Head hurts from smacking.

Fireworks overkill.
Two weeks straight while babies cry.
Even in daylight.

Tony Kennedy.
He’s like a king or something.
Not sure I like that.

Minimum wage.
Supposed to be livable.
Less is slavery.

Let them build the ramp.
Haverhill doesn’t get those jobs.
Let New Hampshire pay.


Councilors have pets.
Special projects near their homes.
They should serve us all.

Downtown Merrimac.
What are they doing to you?
My heart is breaking.

Red Sox got better.
Catchers getting healthier.
Ladders will be climbed.

I like Donald Trump.
Blames immigrants like we should
They’re our one problem.

Recovery homes.
I’m glad there’s more being made.
Let’s not cut funding.

Cut off Mexico.
That’s where heroin is made.
Trump knows ev’rything.

Chicago weekend.
40 injured in shootings.
The Prez said nothing.

Casinos are gold.
New Hampshire will regret this.
Billions will be lost.


Goose poop covered park.
Children running all around.
Fireworks not enjoyed.

Methuen fireworks.
Sunday chosen for traffic.
Plentiful parking.

Terminator flopped.
Schwarzenegger is too old.
Nothing to offer.

Roadside message board.
Reads “Buckle up, it’s the law.”
Change to “Don’t kill kids.”

Hospitals set rates.
ACA’s not socialist.
Like car insurance.

We all lost cable.
During women’s soccer game.
Bad time for update.

Dukakis signed bill.
Year in jail for bad guy guns.
Anybody serve that?

Teenagers harass.
Scary scumbags riding close.
Try to be careful.

Groveland officers.
Found teens who harassed woman.
Wish our cops did that.

We’ll take the flag down.
Just like we did way back then.
Get over your loss.

Fireworks illegal.
Would appreciate crackdowns.
These guys are stupid.

Deportation’s good.
Other countries can do it.
Let’s give it a shot.

More rights for us all.
We’ve more freedoms than ever.
So does big business.


Wars are all ugly.
We’re as guilty as the rest.
Weapons only kill.

Middle class smaller.
Middle class can pay their bills.
That’s what’s important.

Sandown resident.
Unhappy with incumbents.
Wait for elections.

Jeb Bush foot in mouth.
Claims words taken the wrong way.
Clearly he meant it.

Presidents age quick.
Chris Christie is a fat guy.
Heart attacks happen.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s