SOFC 2013 Fantasy Draft: Round 1 (Pick 3)- Tower News Taliban selects Derek Mitchell.


Brown University? They’ve got one of those in Providence, you know.
With the third overall pick, the Tower News Taliban selects Derek Mitchell.

Tobes: I can’t believe Derek Mitchell is still sitting here at #3. It makes me think my opponents didn’t read the scoring, or didn’t understand it (Mark’s a Voke grad). The guy brings nothing but value on top of value. 14 points as a 14 seed, and only like 7 people voted in September. Am I afraid that Fred Doyle and his extra chromosome thinks that the undergraduate program at Brown is garbage? Nope. Am I afraid that the Lowell Sun (despite an endorsement!?!?) regularly misinterprets his campaign points? Nope. Am I afraid that he didn’t grow up with me IN Lowell? Of course not. Think about the people we grew up with? They’re almost all assholes. So I am banking on the literate/gainfully employed portion of the voting population to show up on Nov 5 in droves and get this guy a seat. Welcome aboard Derek Mitchell.

Ned’s Take: Behind the scenes, Tobes is convinced that Derek Mitchell is the type of guy that always has strange IPA’s in the fridge and that to him is an indicator for success. I think he borrowed Fred Doyle’s extra chromosome.

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