SOFC apology to the Taliban

20130801-083545.jpgLowell Sun Column

Jack Mitchell, a member of the Centralville Neighborhood Action Group Board of Directors, has some explaining to do — at least to fellow board members. In a recent on-line comment, Mitchell mentioned the city’s neighborhood groups and the Taliban in the same sentence, as if they’re synonymous. His choice of words have left some neighborhood activists, including two prominent women from Centralville, searching for an explanation. – See more at: http://blogs.lowellsun.com/thecolumn/2013/07/29/angst-in-centralville/#sthash.9cb1A3EW.dpuf

It is a sad day. All these people lining up to declare how offended they are by droning blog commentary referring to hood’group leaders as “Lowell’s Taliban.” Folks that I didn’t even know existed, popping up demanding apologies. Well, I for one am disgusted. I haven’t heard anyone apologize to the Taliban yet.

Sure, it’s been a rebuilding season for the regime, but that doesn’t mean they’d appreciate being compared to the leaders of the Centralville Neighborhood Group. Aside from lower Bridge Street looking a bit like Kabul, there’s really nothing else in common.
I imagine the Taliban is largely indifferent about what you keep in your back yard…from fowl to mortars. And they would never let a couple of hens speak for the entire neighborhood (pun absolutely intended).

Since it seems nobody else is going to get around to it, I’d like to take this opportunity, on behalf of the Greater Lowell blogging community, to apologize to the Taliban for this ignorant, undeserving assault on their reputation. I can assure you, that as long as this Sheriff is on watch, it will never happen again.

Sincerely Yours,

Ned

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4 thoughts on “SOFC apology to the Taliban

  1. I’d be ticked at the “droning blog commentary…” line, but it is exquisitely crafted. Put the Zima’s down, Ned, please. The election’s coming!
    #fanboy

  2. Not a chance Mitchell, Ned does his best work three deep into a Zima sixpack.

  3. I’m off the zimas, per the advice of my dentist. Apparently I wasnt doing my teeth any favors with the candy apple Jolly Ranchers.

    As for the “droning” comment, Jack…I’m just letting you know I’m there. Happy Election season to you too, Sir.

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